America: #1 in wasting time on the internet and selling corn.

First of all, can we just take a moment to acknowledge the fact that we are number one in corn sales???

How's that for exceptionalism!

I think that America is exceptional, but also, Americans do have this belief that they are unique. America has always been a country full of optimism, and the drive to become something great. This belief in ourselves is not a characteristic of every countries' mentality, however. Not everyone around the world has the opportunity and the freedom to be whatever they want to be. Some people are born into a caste that they can't escape, and some people have their lives completely laid out for them by cultural traditions, from the moment they are born. 

The freedom we have in this great country for and the opportunity that we all possess to make something of ourselves is truly a blessing, and something we must never take for granted!

ALAN ALAN AL AL ALANNN

America is weird. We are so much more different than the other countries of the world, it's like we're the bipolar child of the world. There are so many cultures within the U.S, it is as if America has a little world within it. Does this make it better than the other countries? Well, there are two ways to approach this...
First, one might say America is better because it has assimilated so many cultures of the world to become a uniquely different country.
Or, one might say because of all the cultures of different countries America has within, it is the same as all the countries, as it has a little of each within it (once again, like a mini world within one country).
Also, the American approach to freedom, violent revolution, was one of the first and few successful of its kind. This quality of "earned" freedom has drawn these immigrants from other countries, making the U.S. more appealing to them than their current country. So, one of the reasons America is unique is because of these immigrants, providing for the vast array of cultures within one country, setting us apart.
On the political side however, the succession of our leaders has led America into a downfall. We are no longer reigning supreme in the world for our horrible management and foreign affairs. Our economics are also suffering, and the fast developing of other countries is quickly catching up to our slowww development.
Is America unique? Yes. Is America number one? Not so much anymore...

BUT HEY! We have the LARGEST PRAIRIE DOG!!!!
That's gotta count for something. His name is Alan (possibly) and all the other prairie dogs love him.

USA

I believe we are privileged to live in America. We have access to food and water, doctors, and comfortable living arrangements. These are all excellent reasons why America is "#1". While these arguments are contributory towards America's greatness, the main reason I believe we are superior to other nations is our military. We are able to defend, and enforce what **we** believe to be important. Remote causes include our christian founding and beliefs based around the Christian faith. Immediate causes can be linked to our success in medical science and military technology, as well as a stable government.


On a completely unrelated topic, I want to see the woulds largest artificial moose in Manitoba, Canada.




**** the corrupt government officials

American Exceptionalism but also who cares

All nations are different. America has certain elements that separate it from other countries but a lot of that has to do with distance. A big factor in what makes us seem different is the way we came to be our own country. Our revolution was more organized and less bloody than others but it was still bad. We're still similar to other developed countries. Every country has things that make it special. American exceptionalism is just America wanting to feel like a special little snow flake. America needs to get over itself.

I'd like to see the worlds largest artificial sheep because what the heckie is an artificial sheep???

Are we the best?

America is a unique nation that offers many opportunities that other countries do not.  Things like democracy, our free market economy, and our entertainment industry are just a few of the things that make America stand out.  These things, in a way, boost our ego with the help of the media telling us how much better America is that everyone else.  while it is OK to be prideful of your country, sometimes it is good to recognize the good in other countries so that we can better our own.  If we are too busy stating that we are better that everyone, we will never be able to learn and improve.

Also, i would like to visit the largest donut,  located in Inglewood California.

America

America is an amazing country to live in. We are very prideful and think very highly of our country. That is what makes us different from other countries. We are very proud of our accomplishments and everything we are best in, such as the highest GDP and all our world records, such as having a bunch of world's largest roadside attractions. The world's largest attraction I would want to travel to see is the world's largest pumpkin pie because I love pumpkin pie and why not?

The Happiest Place On Earth

America certainly is an AWESOME nation, and, even though we may suffer a bit in a few areas, (like obesity and test scores), we dominate in many aspects! Something we get to be particularly proud of is the very magical Walt Disney World in Orlando, Florida. Being the world's most popular theme park (and one of the most well known companies), Disney far surpasses any other competing parks in the world. And, though countries in Europe and Asia have established Disney parks of their own, the popularity (number of visits annually) of the Florida park exceeds them by far! Also, the man himself, Walt Disney, was born in Illinois, USA, and the sweet, little mouse, who has brought joy to people all over the world, was born in the same country... Thus, America can boast of the park, the man, AND the mouse! Disney is a wonderful example of a nation of joy, freedom, creativity, and unity! GO DISNEY AND AMERICA!

  

On my way to NJ, anyone wanna come?

Well to start, anyone who knows me well will know that I'm a daredevil and a adrenaline junkie. I love the thrill of roller coasters, I love the sudden drop when you are going down the biggest hill of Goliath, and I'm not screaming but I'm shaking from the excitement that is welling up in me. I dream to one day go sky diving, but I will NEVER go bungee jumping because there are things that just bother me about it.... ANYWAY about New Jersey. First off I want to go to Camden, New Jersey, just because I mean we share the name so I figure I'll visit, but the thing that really interests me is the Kingda Ka: the largest roller coaster in the world. The monster of a ride is located at Six Flags Great Adventure located in Jackson, NJ. It boasts a top speed of 128 mph making it the second fastest roller coaster in the world, but the distinguishing factor about this ride is its massive hill. As you slowly reach the top, you are elevated to a height of 456', you then plummet downward in a spiral, and after 50 seconds of pure adrenaline rush, the ride is over. This is one of the only roller coasters on my bucket list, and hopefully sooner rather then later I intend to make way up there to ride it!
















 Now that I think about it... I could leave now and get back Fridayish..  If I'm not at school tomorrow, well you now know why....

What am I... other than late?

(I know this is literally a week late... Whoops!)

Who Am I?

I happen to short, though my family and I are all pretty different sizes. I like to think of myself as having a warm and bright personality, but, admittedly, I can be a bit hurtful at times... I'll just go ahead and warn you, keep your distance when I'm angry. Also, just in case you were wondering, I'm quite good at romance... I'll tag along on any date and sit right in between you while you eat. Just be careful that you don't breathe too hard or talk to fast, or else I might take off. I do not like windy weather, and I really do not like getting wet! I also tend to smell quite nice... Who am I?

America

America is a very different country then all the others.  Many people take pride in where they live that's why you see so many people flying American Flags on their trucks or on their houses. People talk about how great their country is and how its a free country.  America is home to many world record holders and world attractions.  I mean America is number one for the most people to wear jorts as well as the most super bowl wins in the world.  That's pretty awesome. America pretty much invented most of the stuff the rest of the world just joined in. 

Exceptionalism: Nationalism or Patriotism (Come to See a Big Coffee Mug, Stay for a Social Commentary)

Anybody who's study the history and causes around the Second World War, would be very familiar with the idea of nationalism. Nationalism is a state of mind in which one believes that their nation is better than any other, to the extent that they begin to adopt bigotry, racism, and general arrogance. Adolf Hitler used his overwhelming charisma to brainwash his people into following his disturbing ideologies, thus leading to what we think of today as Nazi Germany. Nationalism is also the mindset which compelled young Japanese pilots to fly their airplanes into the side of a US Battleship; a suicidal salute to the "Land of the Rising Sun". However, being proud of one countries accomplishments does not mean nationalism, in fact there is already a term for that, "patriotism". Patriotism is definitely a factor in nationalism, because patriotism (per dictionary.com) means,"Devoted love, support, and defense of one's country; national loyalty." People with a nationalist mindset are absolutely patriotic, they just took it a few steps further.

In my opinion, exceptionalism (based on my research) is walking the fine line between innocent patriotism and nationalism. While exceptionalism does not necessarily entail superiority, it does suggest the idea that America is different from any other nation. This can easily be twisted into a nationalist idea that America is on a completely different level of sophistication compared to all other countries. Let's take a moment to think about whether or not nationalistic exceptionalism (or straight up exceptionalism) is warranted. True, America started off as a very unique indirect democratic nation, which emphasized personally liberty more than any other nation at the time. As history progressed this system became more popular until it became a characteristic of any western country. Post World Wars America had a stunningly modern and powerful military making it the biggest power house rivaled only by Russia. Up to that point the United States had not lost many (if any) wars, leaving a feeling of immortality; however, this was shaken up after Korea and Vietnam. Even now, we don't have the largest military, we don't have the highest GDP, and we are currently $19T in debt. Is nationalistic exceptionalism still warranted? No, not really. Is patriotic exceptionalism warranted? Absolutely. It is always healthy for the people of a country to support their country even through the lowest of low points. No matter what is going on in the white house, on the battlefield, or on the streets; I will always wave the flag of my country because I realize that while our country may be broken right now, it can always be repaired. Also the culture here in Cumming Georgia is one that I love with all my heart; one that is unique to this little corner of the United States. So be proud to be an American, just don't let it go to your head, because we don't want another Hideki Hitler Stalin III.



TL;DR- Exceptionalism + humility> Nationalism


I wanna see the world's largest coffee mug.

Oh, here it is.

Charity and A Georgian Barbeque

As we all know the south is known for its hospitality and good food. Well on April 27 last year Jan Greef held the worlds longest barbeque to raise money for the Diabetes Research Foundation. It lasted 80 hours in the city of Columbus, Georgia. Greef cooked 1000 hot dogs, 200 pieces of corn, 104 pieces of chicken, 558 burgers,and 526 boereworse (South African sausage). The Georgian, who is of South African descent, raised 10,000 dollars for the charity and brought home a more interesting record than busiest airport for his home state. Part of the reason the United States hold so many world records is because we strive to do great and good for the benefit of others and our country.

From the Ground Up

The United States of America is no ordinary country. The U.S. is built on freedom, liberty, and justice for all. Ever since the original colonies fought back against the oppression of Britain, America has been growing bigger and better. There were bumpy roads, but the lessons we learned from these hardships contributed to making this country great.

'Murica

First of all, I would love to visit the worlds largest chocolate waterfall. That sounds amazing.

America is a very unique country. There are no other countries that think of themselves the way Americans think of America. Americans likes to be the best, its part of our pride. There are many things that make us unique such as our history, culture, patriotism, and size. Many Americans feel very strongly about how amazing America is. You don't hear other countries saying stuff like 'Murica. Our patriotism is so strong that even we make fun of it. Our history is so unique and shows our independence. America is over all a very unique country.

Dobi has no master. Dobi is a free elf.

In our world today, we see a lot of persecution. We hear horror stories of people being put down for actions that we are free to do in the US. Our freedoms here are unique to us, which we often take for granted. Our ability to climb social and business ladders areas vital to our system in America. Our freedom of religion is also something so huge that it often gets overlooked. In India, the caste system (although it is outlawed) does not allow anyone to advance socially. Once you are in a certain caste, there is no way of getting out of it. Stories of ISIS persecuting Christians in the Middle East are so prevalent today. We undermine our freedoms so much, although they make America SO great.

Also, i would like to see the world's biggest chicken nugget made here. #GoBigOrGoHome

The world's largest fork?

Out of all the items that America has the "largest" of, I would love to see the world's largest fork. The reason for this is that both Colorado and Missouri claim to have the honors. I would like to take it upon myself to determine which fork is "larger". Of coarse, in doing this, I would need to specify largest. I would probably measure it by height, width, and length and total it all up to determine which is the largest.

Here is a picture of the "World's largest fork" in Colorado

 

 

 

Here is a picture of the "world's largest fork" in Missouri

 

 

 

I will let you be the judge of which one is the "largest" until I get the chance to determine the actual answer.

American Exceptionalism

All countries have their own uniqueness about them. You find different things in England than you would in Japan, different things in Africa than Russia, India than Mexico- it's why we have developed cultures. No two countries are alike and I think that all people pride themselves in that- the individuality of culture. 

But then- what about America? We seem to not only take a pride in uniqueness, but also in exceptionalism. We like to believe that we are better off than other countries- but why? What do we have that puts us ahead of other nations? 

Maybe it's the fact that we were founded on such patriotism. From the very birth of the nation, we believed that it was great. Most other countries were founded on survival and unity in ages past, but America was founded because we thought we could be a better force for good without Britain breathing down our necks. 

Maybe it's because of our success. Think of other nations- the fractured countries of Africa or the Middle East- compared to the powerhouse that is America. We all rebelled. We all threw away that tyranny that oppressed us. But somehow America rose above the rebellion and made a country out of it- rather than broken factions and civil wars. 

Maybe it was God. Mostly it was God. The reason for America's exceptionalism for so many years was because of the exceptionalism of it's God. So... maybe as we try to shove God out of the picture of our country, we also shove out the exceptionalism. Can America be exceptional without God? 

Proud to be an American

I believe that America is great for numbers of reasons... We are unique in our freedoms, mainly religious and political. We are unique because of all the entertainment we provide for the rest of the world (I'm sure America is one big episode of "Keeping Up with the Kardashians" to the rest of the world).
America's voyage to exceptionalism started when the pilgrims first arrived, they came to change their current lifestyle and start a new one. They had to work for it, yes, but in the end they got what they wanted. Their freedom from Britain and the chance to restart this country. This country has a lot of history, there was lots of blood shed and it wasn't easy. But now, we are able to sit here and talk about why we're "Proud to be an American". In America, you have to work to get to the top, and many people can and will work to the top. In other countries, if you're down, you're down. But here we can do and be anything we want! That's why I think that America is great.
Also, I would want to see a roller coaster that goes around the entire United States, that you can ride, and it's the coolest, most thrilling roller coaster in the world!!

American Pride

American pride is a common attribute in Americans. The "pride" is not necessarily negative in this case. It simply means we recognize the incredible blessings that we have been given living in such a country. It is because of this that Americans desire to be the best at everything.
This desire initially stems from a culture that revolves around the greatness of our nation. In most homes, flags are flown proudly and children grow up hearing about the great blessings they have from the endless opportunities.
This heritage was brought to life when immigrants came from England to America. In England, they were kept down by a oppressive social hierarchy. Peasants and laborers could never rise beyond their initial status. When they came to America, they realized that they could rise however high they took themselves.
This is why Americans believe that they should be the best: Because America was one of the first nations in which a person could make themselves the best, despite their current status.
I would like to see the biggest artificial dinosaur.

We're #1!!!

To help you get started thinking about a topic for our American exceptionalism cause and effect paper, here are 27 areas the USA dominates: Link

We like to be the biggest and best, don't we? In fact, you could travel this land and find example after example of "world's largest" attractions. Right here in Georgia we have the world's largest chicken and the world's largest peanut. Is anyone surprised?

For today's post, think about American exceptionalism. Are we inherently different from other nations, or do we just think that at our core we are unique? Either way, what are the main, contributory, remote, and immediate causes? This topic lends itself nicely to a causal chain.

I'd also like to know which "world's largest attraction" you want to see in your lifetime!

Tic Toc

I scream in the morning, but only to help you. If I didn't, then you would never be on time. I guess you could say I have a pretty important job, and I could never sleep in, unless you snooze me. My two hands point to a special number and then I scream. That is when I know you have somewhere to be. Usually if it is a good thing, like Christmas morning, you smile at me but if it is somewhere you don't want to go, like school, you would look at me with hatred. Even though sometimes I get the stink eye from you and you don't really thank me all that much, I still like to help you out. I keep you on a schedule, and without me you would probably be lost. I don't want you to loose track.

*Side question* Can anyone guess what this word is??
There is a word. Six letters it contains. Take one away and twelve is what remains.

ba-dum tish

I thought that Marcel the Shell was funny. Even though I couldn't stand her voice. I found the voice really grating, but the jokes were funny and I appreciate the video as a whole. Now for a riddle.

Here I sit on the wall with my fellows who all know that we're out of our prime. I remember the times when I was a prize and a pride; the careful work put into me still shows. Yet, here I hang on the wall, built to soar, now unable to fall. If only this wire would break so I could remember the way it feels to be unrestrained once more. Loving the air, then hitting the floor. What is my purpose now? Must I sit here collecting dust for all eternity or will I be brought back to the glory of my purpose? I hope so. What am I?

Unappreciated

Most days I am rudely awoken very early in the morning.  If I do not wake immediately, without hesitation, you complain about me. Waking up without being a little tired is too much to ask of a human, so why hold me accountable?  Although I am tired, i still do my job.  As I carry you along, you talk other people, eat, or look at your phone.  I am never appreciated.  Even though these various activities can harm me physically, you do them anyway. I guess they are more important than me.  As we arrive at wherever it is we always go, i finally get to rest.  Later in the afternoon you wake me up again and we return home. Like always, you pay no attention to me. But what would you do without me?  

Biting, gnawing, glinting, cold

I sit here, in front of you. I can be used for so many purposes. Most use me more for practical reasons, their food, their items, their care. However, anything can be used for evil, and I am no exception. I may use my frigid but steel-like nature to bite and grind into someone or something. My nature can change in an instant. I could gnaw through some cheese, or I could tear into flesh with thick red liquid as my reward. It is your choice, what shall you use me for?

What do you see?

You always seek my approval. Be it morning, afternoon, or evening, you always come to me. You stare at me, sometimes for only a brief second, sometimes for a long time. I do not know why you stare at me, for I have never seen myself. Yet I have seen all of your emotions. I have seen you barely awake, rubbing your eyes. I have seen you rushing, late for school, smearing your face with makeup. I have seen you smiling jubilantly, crying hysterically, always looking to me as if for answers. Sometimes you walk away happy, sometimes sad. You tilt your head this way and that, and I assume you must be trying to see me from different angles.
I must be extremely beautiful for you to stare at me each and every day  without fail. If only I could see myself...

Guessing Games are Fun

Soft as a gosling yet transparent like film. The world is topsy-turvy and dim but it's the best way to be. I love my large family, they mean the world to me though I'm not the marrying type. Many are scared of me coming near them even though it's only because I'm hungry. I'm small but important and you'd hate to see me go. I'm rarely seen but it excites people when they see me. I'm a great listener too. I prefer night to day and warm weather to cold. What am I?

Who am I?

Well, here is a short description of me... I am a very free spirit. I've been known to go with the flow and be very chill. Sometimes I can give off an icy demeanor but most people warm up to me eventually. I'm also a clean freak. I hate being dirty. I'd also like to say that I am some what of world traveler. I've been everywhere to the polar ice caps to Victoria Falls in Africa. I'd like to visit Mars one day but we'll have to see how that goes.  

Who do you think I am? 

Figure it out, I already forgot

I must give you a warning, this might get pretty deep. I look down upon any form of piracy. my favorite book is the Old Man and the Sea. My rival is as big as a whale. Anyone that sees my arms calls out "Sucker!" My friends may seem a bit fishy. I'm told I have an inflated head. I hate how the ink prices are rising. Occasionally I like lounging on the beach and people crowd around me. I have a part time job as a lab rat. I'm very camera shy. I prefer for it to be dark.

This one is bad

I like to think of myself as a good guy. I help people. I let them reach new heights. People take advantage of me a lot though. They walk all over me and use me. They don't care about me or my feelings. Sometimes I'm used and forgotten in a matter of moments. They don't appreciate me or what I do. I'm used most at night when people literally run up me after the lights go out. I don't know why. Maybe it's because they like my moving cousin, Esca Lator more. I just wanna help people.

Not my best. But eh, whatever. Take a guess.

When will my reflection show who I am inside?

Well... Let me give you a little description of myself...
I am shiny, I give reflections(multiple kinds). Many people see me and see bad things in the image I present to them, but it's not MY fault they aren't happy with what they see!! I was merely made for pleasure, but people turned me into something to help them find their self worth. Ladies look at me, and they see things that need improvement. Men are the same... Little children just make faces at me and giggle after they see my image. People look at me in search of answers about what they can fix in their lives. They look at me for improvement or in a final glance as they dash out the door. Why do they look at me like that? Why does everyone look at me like I just crushed their self esteem? Why do they look at me and see something in themselves they want to fix? They all have beauty in them, they're all perfect in my eyes, why don't they understand?
But I guess that's just the life of a ________... Maybe I'll never understand the power I have to change how people see themselves... Do you know what I am yet?

Lol

I'm a number that comes after the following numbers; one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen, seventeen, eighteen, nineteen, twenty, twenty-one, twenty-two, twenty-three, twenty-four, twenty-five, twenty-six, twenty-seven, twenty-eight, twenty-nine, thirty, thirty-one, thirty-two, thirty-three, thirty-four, thirty-five, thirty-six, thirty-seven, thirty-eight, thirty-nine, forty, forty-one, forty-two, forty-three, forty-four, forty-five, forty-six, forty-seven, forty-eight, forty-nine, fifty, fifty-one, fifty-two, fifty-three, fifty-four, fifty-five, fifty-six, fifty-seven, fifty-eight, fifty-nine, sixty, sixty-one, sexy-two, sixty-three, sixty-four, sixty-five, sixty-six, sixty-seven, sixty-eight, sixty-nine lol, seventy, seventy-one, seventy-two, seventy-three, seventy-four, seventy-five, seventy-six, seventy-seven, seventy-eight, seventy-nine, eighty, eighty-one, eighty-two, eighty-three, eighty-four, eighty-five, eighty-six, eighty-seven, eighty-eight, eighty-nine, ninety, ninety-one, ninety-two, ninety-three, ninety-four, ninety-five, ninety-six, ninety-seven, ninety-eight, and ninety-nine.

What number am I? 

What.Am.I?

I come in many shapes and sizes, but I don't always have a particular shape. I will eat anything, even when a person doesn't want it. You use me daily, but sometimes more than others. What I eat depends on the day, but it normally pertains to what you are getting rid of. When people don't use me I am sad, but people see my food everywhere.

What am I?

Guess Who I Am

I hang around all day never really move, except in the wind.  I just stay out side a lot especially in the summer.  A lot of things come towards me there like little small flying alive things. I don't really know.  those little alive flying things get attracted to me i guess its my glow or something.  But every time they get close enough to talk to me they just die and will fall.  I guess they just cant handle my great glowing power.  Its very lonely out here.  Look another on is coming, wait never mind its dead i think i killed it oh well.

I guess you can guess. Have fun. I'm confused.  

*insert clickbait*

I really enjoyed that Marcel video, while I had never seen it before, it reminded me of a little sketch that my brother and sister's drama team performed. It was about the journey of chewing  gum from the package, to mouth, to sidewalk, to shoe, etc.

"What's my lifelong dream? Well, it's pretty simple... I want to fly! Most people want to go high in the sky, I just want to go fast without having to worry about the ground or gravity. However, this prison that I find myself in seems to have no escape, I've been trapped here ever since my manufacturing. At least I have a bunch of friends who I can talk to, I like to talk about flying, but they think that I'm crazy. They say that we can never fly, because we're made of metal and there's nothing to propel us. But I think they're wrong, I feel something inside me that tells me that I can fly. Life inside this prison can be pretty scary though... Sometimes the ceiling will be replaced with a really bright light, then it will return. Every time that happens some of my friends always disappears. It's one of those things that you think'll never happen to you... until it does!

The ceiling opened up and I felt two soft and strong appendages grab onto my head and pull me upwards. When my eyes finally adjusted the dark, I saw that I was being moved toward a weird monolith sorta thing. Whatever was holding me was much larger than the monolith and lifted me above it before sticking my face right into a tiny opening. My face was pressed against this hard dark mass until I felt another one of those appendages push my entire body into the opening. It was dark and cramped.. I didn't like it. Then I felt something push me further down into the structure, I realized that it was one of my friends. He didn't know what was going on, but soon enough more of my friends were shoved in here. I then felt the monolith move with us inside of it... there was a loud cracking noise and then we were still. Suddenly, my friend closest to the entrance was sucked out of the entrance, and we all were pushed upward by some mechanism. There was a loud *thud* and then another of my friends was pulled up. My friends were all pulled up one at a time, then there was only me.

I felt my self pulled upward until I could see that I was in a tunnel about my size. I could see a light,"freedom!" I thought; however, what I didn't notice was the hard pressure placed on my feet. Suddenly I felt something on my feet move... Then a hard metal something slammed into my feet and I felt myself literally explode! My entire lower body detached from my head and I was sent flying out the tunnel. I realized that I WAS FLYING! I saw that I was getting ever closer to a large giant until finally I slammed into it. I expected to bounce off of  his large surface, but instead I puncture through his middle. I shattered some hard solid substance and a soft gooey substance. Finally I exited the creature and plowed head first into a stone wall. That's when I bounced off and fell of the ground.

Now here I am, a headless bullet covered in a really wet and red liquidy thingy. I think that giant is about to fal-- oh yep, he fell alright, that was loud! I think he might be dead... Well y'know what they say, 'guns don't kill people... bullets do.'"

You Need Me

I'm super smart and know pretty much everything. You can ask me anything and I can find the answer. When I die, I can come back to life. When you carry me around, I am one of your main priorities. I have become more and more needed and am now an essential for almost everyone to have, especially to keep you from talking to people around you. I am the center of your attention most of the time, but you should definitely pay more attention to me than you already do. I like to talk to people sometimes, but I can only say what you think I should say. Basically, you could never live without me.

What am I??

Who am I?

When I think about inanimate object narratives the first thing that comes to my mind are the anti-smoking commercials that show a cigarette taking control over your life and being a bully. It shows what a cigarette would say if it could talk. https://youtu.be/Hx5FQ2QWEnI




I am controlling. Everyday you come to me and I tell you who to be. I tell you what to wear and I can make you feel bad about yourself. I also do the opposite. I can make you feel wonderful. Some people are addicted to me and love me, others avoid me at all costs because when they see me they see their own insecurity. But don't try to blame your problems on me, I just bring them to the light. Everyday I sit here and I see your life. I try to get involved by making you come to me for advice but I'm jealous of you. Everything that I say to you is what your saying to yourself. I wish I could have a voice of my own but I just mimic you. I see pictures on the walls and envy them. They get to be themselves, I am forced to be you. I try to be controlling but now I realize that YOU are the one controlling me.

Guess Who... I mean Guess What.

I stand all day, in one spot supporting other members of my family. Often my family and I are used for containment or view shielding. I rot outside for years wondering when my family and I will fall again this time to be thrown out and be replaced. Often I sit in the sun, snow, hail, rain, and other elements thinking of the time when I used to be high up in the air casting shadows every where. The day is coming soon when my family and I will lean, be torn down and left to rot. Here comes the owner now to "picket" us apart, This is the end. Goodbye.

Guess Away!

Chris, from Atlanta, Georgia

Hi, my name is Chris. I was born in Atlanta, Georgia. I have a very bubbly personality. When people come into contact with me, they enjoy how bubbly I am. There is a spark of happiness whenever I meet someone. I am tall and slender - most people like that about me. I have often been referred to as the real thing. I've been all over the world. In fact, there are very few places I have never been. Although I bring so much joy to those around me, my life is rather disappointing. Everyone I meet uses me. They rarely want to spend time with me. They just use me, consume me, and then discard my remains. They leave with joy, but I end up empty.

Guess what I am.
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Relationship Goals? Idk

The snail was super cute. The way he used little objects to do daily, human-like actions was really creative.



~

It was warm. The fluid, consistent motion created heat that transferred from me to you. You held me close and firmly.  I am small, but allow for "big" sounds. These sounds have an influence on you, and other people when I am around.

I am worn at the tip from going back and forth between the long, coarse lines. Our relationship is a confusing whirlwind. I am lost and found, then lost again. I am of such importance to you, but yet you keep losing me. You could go without me, but you choose not to. Now, I am in a deep darkness, maybe to be found once again.


Let the guessing begin.

No Ideas But in Things

As part of our ongoing emphasis on narrative, today's blog posts will focus on narratives from inanimate objects. Please watch the video above of Marcel the Shell. It's fairly internet famous, so you may have already seen it, but note the absurd humor, as well as how Marcel feels like a fleshed-out character while still retaining his essential shell-ness.

For your blog post, feel free to comment on Marcel or share other examples of inanimate object narratives. Additionally, please write a 100-word narrative from the perspective of an object. Your object can be anything non-living (sidewalk, lollipop, public mirror). Think about what your object does: what would it find important? How would it see itself? Is it arrogant? Shy? Depressed? What human characteristics does it display?

Here's one I found online:

I wait, in dark, wanting to laugh, but quiet. You will find me. You won’t want to, but you’re drawn to me; to the bait.  And when you find me… I will kill you. Before you realize your mistake, before you pull away, between heartbeats even as close as yours, I will come down with a speed and a force unlike anything you’ve ever known… and I will try to break you in half. 

… And when your cold, lifeless body has been disposed of… They’ll add a bit more cheese… and I’ll call to your friends... They’ll die too.

********************************************************************************

I'll identify the object in the comments. You can have people try to figure yours out, or you can tell us in the title. 

Wanted: Irresponsible Dog and Trick-or-Treating Man

Dog Causes Car Crash
Only a couple months ago, a thirty-three year old woman of Sumter County was arrested for crashing her car into an apartment complex. She immediately drove away to her own apartment but was caught by the police and noted to have smelled of alcohol and looked confused. She refused to take a sobriety test and resisted arrest and was soon in jail for DUI, resisting arrest, and hit and run involving damaged property. Oddly, however, she blamed this accident on her dog, who was in the car with her, saying that he should be arrested, not her... Obviously.

Man Arrested For Steeling Halloween Candy
On October 31 of 2014, the Walbora Police Department was called and arrived at the scene of the Gladys family's house just outside of Tampa, to settle the case of a supposed crime involving theft. 52 year old Bernard Gladys reported that the thief seemed to be a grown man and was dressed in black with a black garbage back. At around 10:30 pm, the man arrived at the doorstep of the house, dumped all of their candy into the garbage bag, and ran off. Many gathered around in suspicion, but, once notified that this had happened just earlier to a neighbor, Mr. Gladys took to calling the cops. When the police arrived, the mystery man was long gone. However, on November 2nd, a 31 year old Floridian man by the name of Martin Howly was declared guilty of the candy crime, arrested for theft and damage of property, and noted to have been previously arrested for similar crimes.

What do you think?! (Don't look it up!)

Snake- Cobra or Copperhead?

An 8-foot king cobra snake that had been missing for more than a month was found under a dryer in a garage not far from its reality TV star owner's home near Orlando.

Officials say a woman contacted Orange County Animal Services on Wednesday night after she heard hissing sounds while putting clothes in her dryer.

~OR~

This snake was only a copperhead at the mere length of 4 feet. It was found in a woman's garage later to be killed by the woman's husband. 

Officials say this happens very often and it has no real danger to finding them. It's only a problem if you make it one.

WHICH STORY IS TRUE??

True or False: Florida Edition

Welcome! On today's episode of True or False, we will be delving into the weird world of the Sunshine State- Florida! We will present you- the viewers- two Florida new stories and you must decide which one is bogus and which one is right-on! So now, we will begin...

MONKEY ATTACKS ORLANDO SUBURBS

A monkey owned by a Florida man in the Orlando suburbs escaped from it's home and begin the ravage the neighborhood. It devoured the neighbor's mail, tore the molding off of a cop car and swung on a street sign. It was latter contained by the police and released back to it's owner. 

FLORIDA MAN VANDALIZES CINDERELLA'S CASTLE IN DISNEY WORLD

Security camera's caught a Disney world guest defacing the beloved Cinderella's castle in the Magic Kingdom. It is said that the Florida man bought a pen at one of the gift shops and then proceeded to write "S--- was here!! :)" on the wall of the covered walkway underneath the castle. He was later caught and fined for his vandalism. 

So, what is it folks? 

Florida...

It was reported that a man on probation drove a stolen car to a meeting with his probation officer. He also had a gun.

It was reported that a man on probation drove a stolen care to Publix with a gun and accidently ran into his probation officer.

Which one is the real one?

The Upper East Side Is All Abuzz

Hey there, East Siders. Gossip Girl here. Your one and only source into the scandalous lives of Manhattan's Elite.

SPOTTED, Blair and Serena were frivolously shopping at Tiffany's and dining at Per Se which is a New American cuisine and one meal would cost $325 per person. Looks like our two favorite besties are having the time of their lives, while poor Nate Archibald seems to be in a bit of a pickle. His father is unemployed due to embezzlement. Good thing Nate has his billionaire friend Chuck Bass to help him out. It’s not really news, but if you haven’t noticed, New York City’s cost of living is pretty steep — and getting worse year after year. Just renting a shoebox-sized room in this city can cost an arm and a leg, which makes most people wonder: If that’s the case, how does anyone afford to live here? The problem can’t really be traced back to a single factor, but rather it’s a conglomeration of issues that continue to compound the problem. Long story short: New York City’s population is growing rapidly and new housing isn’t entering the market at the same rate. Combined with the fact that rent prices are rising faster than incomes every year, New Yorkers (that are not as fortunate as Queen B) are suffering big time.
But something about this city keeps people moving in by the thousands. So, if you’re wondering what makes New York City so expensive, here’s your answer.


See you all tomorrow, you know you love me.

Xoxo <3 shoutout to those of you who got that reference!

The Weirdest State

Many states have quirks and things unique to themselves, but no states produce stories more strange that those from Florida.  Although Florida is located in the southern united states, in many parts it has a much different culture than the rest of the "south".  This culture change is due to a large population of many different culture mixing here.  Maybe this in some way effects the strangeness of some of its people.  I am trying to give Florida the benefit of the doubt, because some of the things you read about Florida dwellers could never be dreamt up.  From forcing your wife to swallow her engagement ring to becoming violent when someone forgets to heat up your frozen pizza, Florida, hands down, produces the weirdest headlines/stories.  

Florida man or Man florida

Florida is a pretty crazy place. I had no idea that Florida man was so famous or crazy. I went looking for some crazy stories and was surprised to find how many there were. I looked through many and picked a story that can hopefully be just crazy enough to fool you guys. Hopefully not too many of you guys saw it too. One truth One lie.

Florida Man Escapes Prison to Buy Beer, No One Notices.
Adams told deputies he escaped a work detail and went to the Metro Food Mart. He planned to smuggle chewing tobacco, cartons of cigarettes and alcoholic beverages back to the Sumter Correctional Institute in Bushnell. Video from the store shows that Adams changed from his inmate uniform before going to the store, the report says. He then returned to his work crew without corrections officers noticing.

Florida Man Desecrates Deceased Girlfriend's Grave in Name of Love
A Sarasota county man allegedly dug up his girlfriend's coffin on the anniversary of her death in order to "check that she was still dead." Authorities found the man in an elf costume preparing to open the coffin. The man later stated that he had a dream where the deceased asked him to come and get her. "I did it for love." He is quoted as saying. "I missed her so much, I couldn't stay away." 

The Internet Hates All the States

Florida may seem super crazy and get a bad reputation, but there bad stereotypes for all the states. Just by typing a state's name into the google search bar you can see what people think about all the other states. A few of them I looked up are:


Why is Georgia...

So racist?
So boring?
So bad?

Why is California...

So dry?
So strict on guns?
all liberals? 

Why is Maine...

So white?
So weird?
So poor?

Now there is obviously some truth to these questions, but they are not universally true for the whole state and its people. Im pretty sure that Im not a racist and Georgia may not be a Hawaii or a California but I don't think its that boring. While it may sometimes seem like it, California isn't completely composed of liberals. I don't know too much about Maine other than I imagine mooses and snow all year around when I picture it, but Im sure its not that weird. Also I don't know if people are asking "Why is Maine so White?" as a racial question or as weather question.

I can't really speak for all the people who made comments about these states, but I am going to speculate that most of the people who asked these questions don't actually live in the state their asking about. They probably either visited there or already had stereotype driven into their head through the media.  But the bottom line is that we reaffirmed the internet is a curious place where people are aloud to ask offensive questions without being considered ignorant or judgemental.

Sniffing Feet vs MANATEES!

So clearly Florida has lots of problems and weird stories. I decided to go to the 7th page of Google to help me in my quest to find the weirdest Florida news story. Of the following, only one is true. You decide.

Sniffing Feet
52 year old Eddie Juan was arrested days after complaints had been coming in from a local library. The man was caught sneaking under the tables in order to smell people's feet. He was charged as a sex offender, fleeing and eluding, reckless driving, aggravated assault and resisting without violence as he did flee on a scooter after the police attempted to arrest him.

MANATEES!
Ryan Waterman was arrested after posting a picture to twitter of him holding a baby manatee calf. He believed he could speak to the manatees and was kindly helping the little calf find its way. Once the picture was traced, he was arrested and charged with violation of the Manatee Sanctuary Act, which protects the endangered species. The 24 year old Waterman plead guilty and insane and the court is still awaiting a decision.


So which one really happened?

Racism in Texas

I spent the early part of my life in Texas. Many media sources depict Texas as being full of racists. I personally think this is an outdated view. I have seen evidence the elderly grew up in a racist environment. However, times have changed, and people should stop picking on Texas.

Man and Buffalo vs Wild Squirrel Invasion

While I was reading all of the headlines, I was not able to refrain from laughing. Some of them made me cringe (A LOT), others were just really really funny. The two articles I chose are the following.

A man one morning was sitting in his recliner, than all of the sudden the stuffed buffalo head that was hanging above him fell, and he was trapped. The buffalo head was too heavy for him to lift, but he was able to reach his phone and call for help.

Squirrel's decided one morning to invade a Florida middle school, they even proceeded to pee on one of the students. The student was sitting at his desk, when all of the sudden a liquid fell from the ceiling on to the student and onto his books.

Which one is the real article and which one is the fake, you decide...

Why is Florida so weird??

There are many weird things in the US and all over the world, but Florida has some pretty crazy people. In Florida, on their local news there have been countless events that are pretty weird.  On story is that there is a local business that will bring alligators with their mouths taped shut to kids birthday parties and pool parties. Like how stupid are you to let a alligator that could kill someone swim around in a pool with kids. Like wouldn't that be dangerous or something. Another weird and stupid story is that a Florida man died  after he was competing at a bug eating contest at his local reptile store.  Like if your going to eat bugs at least make sure they wont kill you first.

Faith in Humanity=0

Behold, I bring two stories featuring the notorious "Florida Man". One of these stories is complete bunk, the other is most likely true.

Florida Man accidentally butt-dials 911 while cooking meth with his mom.

A police operator stayed on the line for nearly half an hour listening to them "talking about making and selling methamphetamine,". The operator also detected a "bubbling sound as if something was cooking." During the 911 call a man who identified himself as "Tommy" stated that he was on probation and complained that a police official "had been watching him."

Florida Man arrested for punching protected Tortoises 

Wildlife Officer Tom Reid caught a Citrus County man capturing and punching gopher tortoises. Tom Reid initially spotted a pile of dead gopher tortoise shells in the woods of Citrus County. When Reid returned the next day, he got much more than he bargained for. He found four captured, live tortoises. Soon after that he heard a truck headed his way. Reid saw the man,"come right up to the tortoises, I saw him take them out of the box. Then he put them on the back of his truck, belly up so they wouldn't move around and stuff, and he just started punching them." That's when Reid introduced himself, much to the man's surprise. The man admitted to punching at least 15 gopher tortoises to death. The Citrus County suspect has been cited and given felony charges for intentionally killing an endangered species.  

"And the Chubbiest State Award Goes to... Mississippi"

In the South we are known for our hospitality, accents and fried foods. I guess this is why the chubbiest state in our nation is in the South. Mississippi, the chubbiest state in our nation, has held this title for the past decade, with an adult obesity rate of 33% and states such as Tennessee are not far behind with rates of 30%. In fact eight of the ten chubbiest states are in the south. In Mississippi, this is due in part to the 21% of people living below the poverty line whose only option is cheap fast food. This is also due in part to many of the citizens being lazy and not engaging in mush physical activity, but seriously who wants to go for a run in the hot, humid southern summer. I guess the south will always be chubbier than the rest of the country because of things like poverty, lack of grocery stores, and less physical activity, but at least we know how to cook.

Florida...yeah...

So I think it is safe to say that Florida has some really interesting people.  Here is a interesting story I found of a man in Florida who was accused of killing a goat and drinking its blood for a pagan sacrifice. Who might be this man? Well his name is Augustus Sol Invictus, an attorney, who was planning on run for senator in Florida. Why did he do it? he did because of his religious beliefs and no he his not running for senator any more. Here is an other interesting story. A Florida man steals 4 million pounds of citrus fruit which is worth over $540,000. How did he steal the citrus fruits? he simply walked on to the groves of where the fruit where grown, and took them all. It is still unknown what happen to all the citrus fruits.